And if one does not give up, THIS AIN’T SO BAD!

Papa, Me, Kay, Grover & Wally-dog, leave MF.

QuoteBliss.com ‎10/29 - "When one door of happiness closes, another opens; But often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us." - Helen Keller

   My two best friends are leaving school, retiring. I really hate that. I could just cry. But you know tears, won’t change the fact. But nonetheless, that is exactly what I feel like doing, but tears allude me, now! I know things will never be the same. Our outdoor Bar B Ques, that we always had together, with several other friends, will be lacking two VIP’s. I loved having them, cause I could always count on them two, to bring several dishes, and they were always so wonderful, so was everything they cooked. Especially the Pies, Kay made. She makes Fabulous Pies, she cooks for her Daughter’s Restaurant, back home and she also makes them for the Bank, people loved to buy them. She graced our table with lots of them. I  have several of her recipes to cook, pies too. And if one does not give up, THIS AIN’T SO BAD!

Me & Despina

Plus the Baklava, my Greek Friend, Despina, always made for us, all. And the Greek foods she would bring, really added something special, to our table. Then there was all the Greek meals, she would cook, for each one of my children, as they came to town, to visit. Everybody in the entire family has met, Despina. They totally, love her. She is such an excellent cook. I have to really try, she is a natural. But I got several of her most wonderful recipes, plus the Baklava and I intend to make them too. And if one does not give up, THIS AIN’T SO BAD!

Our kids and Grand kids,  absolutely love her, she has sewn, so much for them over the years, they call her Grandma Despina. They loved every item, she ever sewed. She has given, so willingly, of her talents for other people, she is truly a selfless person. She is like Dorcas, in the Bible. She and I, used to meet every afternoon and sew for the family. They will miss that greatly, all the clothes she used to make for them, for she was exceedingly fast, and I, sorry to say, am not. I will continue to sew, but at a slower pace, but it won’t be as much fun, as having someone, to share the task with. But I love Music, and can always ‘blare’ the afternoon away, while sewing. And if one does not give up, THIS AIN’T SO BAD!

Now, telling all of this, really makes me want to cry. But tears still allude me. I hate change. I wish it could stay this way, forever, keeping all your friends around. But then, I like all good things, forever. We’ve had loads of fun, over the years together, building one another up. We will all go our separate ways. Maybe we’ll see each other again, who knows. After all, they are only moving, and there is always the telephone. But when daily happenings, keep you busy, you call less and less, and it gets easier and easier, to put off a call, or Text, or e-mail or letter, you really need to make, for loved one's, sakes. I find that, so true. But I can say, we will miss each other terribly, well, I know for a fact, I will. But thank God for feelings. It’s a sign your alive, but most feelings are a temporary state of being. So what. And if one does not give up, THIS AIN’T SO BAD!

And I will have to find new things, to occupy my afternoons, instead of visiting with the two of them. I can study more on my languages, play more on my instruments, maybe improve cleaning things faster, write more, finish all my books I have on the back burner, write Blogs more and Paint lots. Maybe I’ll find new Friends to take up the slack. That is always a possibility. But I know it took me years to find such devoted Friends, and learn how much we had in common. Despina, I have known for years, but it wasn’t until we got to know each other better, that we got to be the Best of Friends. Friendship is not easy. One has to work at it. One has to develop, likes and interests, that one has in common, with the individual. With some, Friendship comes easy, seems almost instantaneous, with others, it does not, it takes a while. But it is worth the effort and  it does work, this making new Friends. When I first moved here, I had none. One just has to stick it out. When it seems like we are lonely again, Walla, we find a Friend, to come take up the slack. And if one does not give up, THIS AIN’T SO BAD!

And after all, I still have a couple of, VERY DEEP FRIENDSHIPS, here in town, that I HAVE DEVELOPED OVER THE YEARS, AND AM WORKING, ON KEEPING! They will help me, keep from having a melt down. Peggy is so thoughtful with me, and we see each other frequently, I am so happy, she is in my life, so I really need to give more, to them of my love, of myself. She is super intelligent, and we banter about health issues and family. She is a very special person. I am blessed because of her.They are both superb girls, and Sally(I am getting to know a little better as time goes on.) She is so easy to get along with and super funny. So now, I will be able to spend more time with them, develop an even deeper Friendship with each one, if I just don’t cordon myself off, and withdraw, because Life is not Perfect, and it does not go exactly the way, I want it to, all the time. Which I do admit to having done, because it is very difficult to reach out to others. But so what. And if one does not give up, THIS AIN'T SO BAD!

Like I said, I do not like Change. But Change is inevitable. When I first came here, I did not want to stay here, but I have learned, to appreciate the landscape, and enjoy painting it, tremendously. And I will miss it very much, when I leave, as I have missed everywhere we lived over the years. One gets attached to the funniest of things. The beauty of this place is astounding. And the Weather is Superb, except for the dust storms. But I missed Oklahoma, trees and grass and I hated leaving that, to come here. When I lived there, I loved being in the Country and making a home come alive with Love. I missed Relatives, I don’t get to see, some of them, hardly ever, and there is always Reunions when one can make um. But so what if you miss things. You get heavy on Friends. Oklahoma is just DIFFERENT than Arizona. I learned to plant trees here and my husband planted grass and Roses, beautiful Roses in the Desert, that blooms with Love, every time you see one. And the grass is green, front and back. And if one does not give up, THIS AIN’T SO BAD!

    I say all that, to say over the years, I have had Friends, I loved deeply, but I lost contact with them. This time around, I say, I will try harder to keep the Friends I have. Cause I have moved a lot, and you lose Friends, all the time, that way. But Facebook has a way of picking Friends back up, that one knew, a long time ago. That is what is so great about the Internet. It allows us to interface with others, and even make new Friends, on the Web and new Web Friends are great. And if one does not give up, THIS AIN’T SO BAD!

    I was reading today where, soldiers, go to some sort of Training Center to do Rehab, with the help of Mental Health people. Broken men, needing help, who think, no one cares. The article said, some of them,  simply cop out. 4 so far from Fort Collins alone. They say they are looked down upon, because they see a Psychiatrist. So what. Well, Society tends to like it’s people whole, but it’s actually not whole itself. So what. I see a Psychiatrist, not a lot now, of course. And if one does not give up, THIS AIN’T SO BAD!

Some talked about all the pills, they have to take for anxiety, sleep deprivation, depression and pain. Some  are purposeless, can’t find their way, get depressed over damaged bodies, problems at home, slow moving Bureaucracies, bad discipline from their inferiors. And they even get addicted to some of the pain pills they take. One of them said, they have to take a whole lot of pills. But you know what. I take 14 pills a day, plus 6 vitamin pills =20 pills a day. Why not, take the pills, who knows maybe, there is a chance they will help you, even the pain pills. I take pain pills and so what if I get addicted. I am so addicted to cigs, and Sangria, that after you say that, you may as well stop confessing, any more addictions. But I have learned to accept myself, for who I am. And if one does not give up, THIS AIN’T SO BAD!  

  

THIS IS ME. TAKE ME OR LEAVE ME. AND IF YOU CAN STAND ME, THEN I HAVE GAINED ONE MORE FRIEND TO BEMOAN, AND BEMOAN THEM I WILL. We need to bemoan people. I THINK IT’S GREAT TO BE ATTACHED TO SOMETHING, PEOPLE PREFERABLY, BUT ANIMALS ARE GREAT ALSO. THEY TAKE YOU JUST LIKE YOU ARE, BUT REMEMBER THEY TAKE OTHERS JUST LIKE THEY ARE, TOO. AND SO SHOULD YOU. LOWER YOUR EXPECTATIONS OF PEOPLE. And if one does not give up, THIS AIN’T SO BAD!

I am slowing down at a faster rate than I used to speed up. It takes me twice as long to do ½ as much. But so what. I just give myself plenty of time, to entertain, exercise, sing, play music, clean house, sew, knit, work in the garden, study, write, paint, have sex. And if one does not give up, THIS AIN’T SO BAD!

TOO MANY PEOPLE WANT, TOO MANY THINGS PERFECT. THIS AIN’T GONNA HAPPEN. What the truth is, we all have problems, but they are usually minor ones. And so what, if you happen to have MAJOR ONES. So what? And if one does not give up, THIS AIN’T SO BAD!

We tend to magnify PROBLEMS, to such a high degree of relevancy, that it is impossible to figure out, why we are doing this. Society is the culprit I guess. THEY LOVE DRAMA, as EVIDENCED BY THE MOVIE INDUSTRY. LIFE AIN’T A MOVIE, IT’S LIFE. GET REAL-TIME FOR A CHANGE. I do love Movies, now don’t get me wrong. Just in it’s place. I write books, after all. Just remember. Society really loves, to Rev up, the rules, on you. But it gets easier, the older you grow. And if one does not give up, THIS AIN’T SO BAD!           

    I can’t get to those men who have fought for their Country and feel like no one cares for them, for I ain’t in the Mental Health Business and that is who they are seeing. But I can write this for them. Not a one of them may ever read this, BUT WHO KNOWS, MAYBE THEY WILL, SO I WILL SAY, “I CARE, And if one does not give up, THIS AIN’T SO BAD!

 But you, who are reading this, and that is pretty doggone important to me, whoever you are, that makes you, A VIP PERSON. For I really do want to make a difference in someone else's life, as well, as my family and friends, if only to let them know, LIFE AIN’T SO BAD.

And if your reading this, well, DON’T GIVE UP, THIS WRITING AIN’T SO BAD,
I’LL IMPROVE WITH AGE AND TIME!

1. JUST KEEP ON TELLING YOURSELF AT EVERY STEP OF THE WAY,
2. NO MATTER WHAT YOU ARE FACING. 
3. And if I don't give up, THIS AIN’T SO BAD! 

Love Nina

The heart is rich when it is content,
and it is always content

when its desires are fixed on God.

      -- Miguel Cordero-Munoz

If we are to accept the teaching of Jesus at all, then the only

test of the reality of a man's religion is his attitude to his

fellow men. The only possible proof that a man loves God is the

demonstrated fact that he loves his fellow men.

      -- William Barclay

Prayer

Now when Daniel knew that the writing was signed, he went into his house; and his windows being open in his chamber toward Jerusalem, he kneeled upon his knees three times a day, and prayed, and gave thanks before His God, as he did aforetime.-- Dan_6:10

#231/365

Here we have a praying man. He did what was his usual habit. He prayed before His God. It was a normal act for a normal Christian, to seek God in all things.

Now I think, Daniel knew what he was doing. He had been ordered, not to pray to God. But it was such an ingrained habit of his, that he thought naught of praying, to the God of the Universe, who listened to him, before this Edict was written, and listened to him, after the Edict was written. He knew God was listening to him, even now, at such a time as this. I do not think he had any qualms at all, about contacting His God, for Daniel had such a close relationship with him, before this happened to him. He did what he knew to do. Take it to the Lord in Prayer.

    Now, I sometimes happen upon things, that I do not understand. But I am so tuned into God, because, I take all things to him, that when bad things happen, it is nothing, for me to contact Him for help, for I know there is no help coming, from any one else but Him, unless He allows it. I want His input, into the outcome of bad things, for I know, He has a reason, for all things, good and bad. We can be taught, all kinds of things, by being pushed, into God’s Gates, and pulled, into God’s Courts of Praise. Then we are admonished, to come into His Holy of Holies, and find out what it is, God is doing with us.

He wants us to always come to Him, at all times, for all things.

When we don’t, we leave God out, and then whatever happens, we cannot tell if God is in the outcome, but if we take it to the Lord in Prayer, then we are guaranteed, that the results are what He wants to happen.
Now here, Daniel got thrown into the Lion’s den. Even his King, did not want this to happen, but he realized, he had signed the Edict, and he had to follow out his command, to kill the one’s who disobeyed him. But ah, God had another purpose, He witnessed to the King, that Angels from God, had protected Daniel, therefore he was not harmed. The King was so happy, for he loved Daniel. Now the King stated Daniel’s God was the one true God, and was to be worshiped. And this is what happened. And the King came to know, who God was and what His  power, to accomplish things was.

    God even let Nebuchadnezzar, the Babylonian King ,eat grass and act just like an animal, for 7 years, to make him understand, who was in control of all things. He indeed came back to his senses, and understood who was in control. He did not brag anymore, about his capacities, or try to take God’s place and honor.

    Now, I believe Daniel is a tough example for us, about following God, through thick and thin. Sometimes we may not like the things, that happen to us, as dry twigs, but we are forewarned, that they will happen. If they did such things to a ‘green tree,’ what do we think, they will do to a dry tree?

    What we must do, is follow Daniel, into the Lion’s Den and allow the Angels, to Minister to us, as they did to him. We must leave, the outcome of all things, to the one God, who is Sovereign enough, to deal with each one of us, as we trod this life’s road. Never, should we ever, disavow God’s Power, to handle our meager problems. He has promised, never to leave us nor forsake us, and the best Christians, can believe that the Angels, or the Lord Himself can appear like in Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego’s Furnace made 7 times hotter than Normal. 

Just  believe  God, He will deliver, His Way.  As he did in these men’s lives, so will He do in our lives. But we must Pray!!!

Love Nina
Later more later

Spring

I sit here, and look out my window, and the trees have budded, all the Elms, and all the Oaks. More than budded, they have downright, tiny leaves, all over the Trees. The fruit trees have flowered. I have a White Flowered, Apricot Tree, a Pink Flowered, Peach Tree, a White Flowered, Apple Tree and  Two White Flowered, Cherry Trees. The Positive thing, I love the Spring Time. It is a time, to renew all dead things, the Winter has dealt a thunderous blow, too. For a while it looked like Winter had won, and not one Tree, would survive the Cold, nor the 60mph Winds that blew up, Dust, all over the place. One would think, there could be nothing, or no one, that could live, upon the Silent Cold, that ate it’s way over the Landscape, and deposited Snow Flakes, that would not even emulate one another.

    But Positively, Spring came into being. One day, I looked up and the Green Leaves flourished, over the Trees, that had been dead to any Color but the darkest part of the Bark. I could not believe my eyes. I wondered when I had missed the 'Coming Out Party.' But there it was, Positively Green, everywhere, bright Verdant Colors, that lay upon the Myriad of Trees, over the neighborhood.

    It was a Beautiful Resurrection. I was just sorry, that I missed it’s inception. But I have been so tied up, with duties that know no end, that I just missed that ole Winter, when it left. But it had left, and was I ever so glad. It seemed like, this Winter knew no end. We had Snow all the time, and for the High Desert this was unusual. A Wet Winter, was not part, of the usual decor of Winter, around here. It was usually a few Snowfalls and rather Dry. But not this year. It seemed like 
Water was everywhere, if not in the form of 'Cold, Frozen Precipitation,' there was always the 'Wet, Cold, Dampness of Water,' that fell from the Sky, onto the Dry, Dusty, Parched Desert Plants, that abound around this Part of the Country.

    Now what difference does it make anyway. This change in Seasons? Well, I am reminded of a time in my life when Spring meant Cleaning, and buying new white items and switching clothes around so the Summer things were brought out and the Winter Wool items were boxed away for another year, one which, I can not even fathom happening. When I put the old items away, I never think about getting Winter items out again. Spring is too new for me to do that. I check out all the Warm Weather clothes and think, will it ever be 80 degrees again. But alas, I sense a new expectancy, that soon I will be reveling and carousing around in all my Shorts, Capri’s and Sandals, for the Weather will soon be getting ‘HOT,' 'once again.’ And I love hanging up and folding up all the Summer wear, soon to be worn. As I said before, Spring usually means cleaning, but not here. Too many Dust storms, and we leave for the Summer, and the Dust creeps into all the nooks and crannies, and it would be a waste of time to clean in the Spring. Now, I do all my Spring Cleaning in August & September, in the Fall. By then the winds have settled down, and so has the dust. Then when I clean, I know it will stay clean longer, but the Dry Dusty Desert, gives a clue to it’s cause and effect. You just got to figure out who did what in what room with what weapon!

One, does not ever, get rid of  Dust around here. It settles, like fine, grain sand, upon everything. One time, when I came back from being gone for the Summer, I opened up my bed and there between the sheets was dust and grainy sand. Now in order to get there it had to seep through 5 quilts and a bedspread. That ought to tell you something.  It is so fine that it indeed does seep through that many quilts to deposit it’s gift between the sheets. One has only to wash everything on the bed, in order to make it cleaner than it was before. One never achieves, 'cleanness in toto,' for that animal does not exist, but one can get rid of obvious dust, with a dust buster and a wet rag. That is my experience with Dust. Last year we had 9 Negative Dust Storms, by the middle of April. This year has been repentant and allowed us 4 at the most, so far, by the end of April. But I expect this year to follow last year exclusively, enough so, that I am still anticipating, at least a few more of those, Okie Dust Bowl Days, here in Arizona. But that is to mention the Negative part of Spring and March Winds. 

No, I do not expect I will give too much, more time, to the Negative. I will concentrate on the Positive Side of Spring. AND BOY, IT DOES HAVE, IT'S POSITIVE SIDES. Walking for one. If and when one can make sure the Winds are not booming, one can have a rather nice experience walking around, the two Schools we have around here. Approximately 2 miles a day, if one can bear to last for that long. But I am  just about guaranteed, if I go the full distance, that I can lose a solid 1 lb. Now that is good news, since I am on a Lifestyle Change and trying to lose weight, 11 more lbs to be exact. I have lost 9 lbs and am 11 lbs away from my 20 lb weight loss goal. I am working toward a new Bathing Suit, a Lobster Dinner and a Bottle of Sangria, if I hit my Goal. So I am going to have to attempt, to do the walking exercises, at least 3 days a week. This is a great Positive outcome from Spring, my desire to look and feel better by the time of my Birthday, May 30th. I am quite excited about all, that I can accomplish. It gives me confidence, to attempt so much more in life, than just personal Bodily Goals.

    Now Spring is Beautiful, I might add. So Beautiful, that it takes one’s breath away, just to look at all the, birthing of symptoms, on a daily basis. I am forever amazed, at all the Beautiful People, that Spring brings out, to troll the walkways in. They have a Spring in their Step, and a Smile on their Faces, and even the most Dour Individuals, appear to have forgotten, they don’t like life, and begin to put a 'Mask of Pure Delight,' upon their heads, so as to give others a shock value, go figure. I love what Spring, does to other people. Not just me. But everybody, begins to act a little dorky, even strange maybe. Everybody, I know, acts like, they have accomplished, some great feat, by defeating another Winter, so they wear Spring like a brand new Easter Bonnet, or a Dapper Hat, and want to tell you, all their Myriad of Stories, of Winter’s Gloom, until they realize, they just escaped it, by the Skin of their Teeth, and here they are, in all their Glory, wearing each day, like brand new Easter Clothes.

    Oh yes, folks, I love Spring. It makes me Positively Horney! That is the best thing I love about Spring.

Love Nina
Later more later

Faithful

Thou hast been faithful over a few things— Mat_25:21

I said, "I was never going to put my Daily Devotionals on this Blog. They belong in a book." Which is where I have them. But alas, one must never, say never, where God can hear! Perhaps a few, will be OK, until I get the jest of, what a Blog is all about!

#230/365

    It is so very hard and difficult, to remain Faithful, when no one is watching. To do a lowly task well, when one is all alone, is a tremendous responsibility. For we always know, we can take short cuts, hasten the job, do it sloppily, no one will ever know. But, if we become, tuned into sloppy work, then, when we are being watched, we will fall into that SAME, SLOPPY, pattern of behavior.  Everybody has known someone who does sloppy work. One is always having to go back and correct this sloppy work, so that the task is done well. Most bosses know, who does good work. I for one know, when someone is giving it their best, and when someone is careless, and trite, about what needs to be done. Sometimes it's dangerous to yourself and others, to be careless. Driving while drunk, reaching for Cell Phones or Texting somebody, not paying attention to med doses, turning the wrong valves, not being Safety Conscious, these all 6 garner, shudders from most people.

    Let me tell you, even when I do Dishes, I want the Cleanest Dishes in town. I want my Ironing to be Superb. I want my Exercise to be done with Effectiveness, I want my Writing to be the Best I am capable of, I want my Studies to be done with All My Mind, I want to Work with all my Might and

I want to Love 'With All My Heart,' 'WHOMEVER I LOVE,'    

Then, I feel like I have done a great job, no matter, whether anyone watches me or not. For then I sleep well, knowing I have done my all. How much more can one give, but their all? For even Jesus wants your all. He doesn’t want a disciple, that is not willing to give it, everything they have. For then, he would have a sloppy disciple. Even if, we give our all, and we fail him in all, so what, he knows we were willing, to give it a try, with everything we got. Then he is willing to meet us 1/2 way and under gird us. For if you don’t try to do things, you will never know, whether you can do anything or not. To leave one’s gifts on the table, is a waste of gifts. God will take them. Use everything you've got, you'll be very  happy, you did. Your not judged, by what you don't have, but you are judged by what you don't do........and being careless falls into that category.

    Now, I may not be the best Christian, walking the face of this earth, but I will tell you this, it won’t be from lack of trying. I feel any one, lowly to the highest, can be Faithful, in the least of these things. And when they complete their task, at the end of a hard day or a hard life, then they can say, well, the trait, I am going to be remembered most for, is my Faithfulness. I was Faithful to the Gospel, I was Faithful to my family, I was Faithful to my friends, I was Faithful to my Country, I was most of all Faithful to myself. 

Only I, can ascertain that I DID MY BEST. No other Judgment counts, except for the one Jesus gave on the cross. HE PAID IT ALL.
    FAITHFULNESS, IT TAKES NO TALENTS, NO GIFTS, NOTHING SPECTACULAR, BUT IT TELLS US, WHAT GOD REQUIRES OF US. WE MAY NOT BE THE BRAINIEST PERSON AROUND, OR THE MOST GORGEOUS, BUT OH, HOW WE CAN WASH FEET(DO THE MUNDANE TASKS, HE REQUIRES OF US.)

    God is so gentle and understanding of our predicaments in life, with it being unfair to us, in all it’s outcroppings, and He knows how we feel, and He wants us to see, that to be Faithful to Him does not require our Circumstances to be  the greatest, ‘Desire We  Possess.’ We are to show Him, that we can see that He outshines the Sun, in all His glory. We don’t have to perform, in order for him to notice us or observe us, for He really is not interested in, what all we can accomplish. For Him it is piddly at best. Even our Best, is naught much, next to His feats. But, oh how much, He desires us, to come into, His Hallowed Halls of Righteousness, and look around, and be dazzled at all 'God is, and has accomplished and is accomplishing and will accomplish.'

We just need to tune into, how very FAITHFUL HE IS, then and only then, CAN WE SEE, HE IS FAITHFUL, to the tiniest, the most undeserving, the most unnoticed, of all people, us. HE IS TUNED INTO US, SO WHY WOULD WE NOT DESIRE TO BE TUNED TO HIS STATION, FOR HE IS THE ONE, WHO IS GOING TO BE THERE, WHEN ALL ELSE FAILS US, AND BELIEVE YOU ME, THEY WILL FAIL YOU, SOME OF THEM, as noted by Job!

This is not to say, that all, of your friends, are in the failing business, for some are faithful and fail you not(CONDEMN YOU NOT.) BUT JOB HAD 3 PRECIOUS FRIENDS, WHOM HE LOVED DEARLY, but when things began to go South, they were indeed, into the 'BUSINESS OF CONDEMNATION.'

THEY DID NOT UNDERSTAND HIM AT ALL. THEY THOUGHT HE GOT WHAT HE DESERVED FROM GOD. THEY DID NOT UNDERSTAND GOD AT ALL!

But we know it was all a test, the devil gave. DON’T FAIL IT LIKE JOB’S, 3 FRIENDS DID. Remember, it was not them, God Justified, but he returned Job to his former state, riches and all, because Job was found Faithful to God! He passed His Test! But then God knew he would. Those 3 friends were found unfaithful, to Job and God. THEY FAILED A  TEST THAT WAS NOT EVEN GIVEN TO THEM!

Love Nina 
Later more later

Feelings!

There is, therefore, now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus.-- Rom_8:1.

#227/365

 Boy, oh boy, oh boy, do people like to tell you off. They like to preach to you about sin, lack of good deeds, pride, your past that comes and slides in as a home run, your present where you just can’t seem to be Christian enough to get it right, and your future that becomes magnanimously huge, where you look like a person trying to make it as a born again believer, but instead you resound with notes that resemble, someone who does not even make a good non-believer or a  rather lousy failure

Must be something that I am doing, have done, or could do, that is keeping me from feeling completely and totally good about the fact, that I am, who I am, and what I  should be, for God.

    Ever feel this way? Well, I do all the time. It’s as if I am climbing a very high Mountain and can’t get past the base line. The worst people of all, to generate these kinds of feelings for me, are none other than all the fellow Christians that I know. They seem to have it together, all happy like and harmonious, and I seem to be falling apart. They seem to be able to find the ‘light’, and all I find is the darkness of a situation where there is no light that would dare fall upon, such a creature as I behold, at times. How can I ever ‘feel good’ about serving, A Risen Savior, when I no where resemble the kind of person that is spoken of in the bible, who is ‘doing as God bids.’

    Now, I have spent so much of my life in doing the mundane things of life, that at times AS I GROW OLDER, I turn around and look around and think, ‘Gee, I ain’t done a cotton picking thing as far as accomplishing things goes.’ Just cook, clean, sew, parenting, etc. you get the picture. Now some might think these are ‘well accomplishments’ but how many headstones in the grave yards say, he mowed the grass, ‘without complaining,’ or she cleaned and did dishes, ‘without complaining.’  I ain’t never read one....like that.

    Yet, to do mundane tasks, ‘as unto the Lord,’ is indeed a Godly Accomplishment! Even if we are not Missionaries, or Great Preachers or  Doctors, or something rather exotic or etc, we can still just be ‘NORMAL NOBODIES and KNOW IN OUR HEARTS, WE ARE NOT CONDEMNED.’

    And this is what I want. I want to be seeped in this verse until it comes out of, all my pours, the scripture that guarantee’s us knowing that we can be accepted, are accepted, and will be accepted, by the Lord of Lords, and God. This is, in no way putting down anyone who is accomplishing things, they are wonderful, but they know it.  There is a POWER IN ACCOMPLISHING THINGS, BUT THEY STILL NEED, (NO CONDEMNATION TOO.)

     We don’t have to be compared to nobody else. Hallelujah, I need that. Not even the most religious person out there, that seems to know all the bible verses better than we do, or acts in a manner, that sometimes makes us think we should be acting, ‘so much more religious,’ and then more people would just adore us so much more, and even ask us to teach, Sunday School, because they would be oh so impressed with our Credentials and Christianity. Quite frankly, I am tired of thinking, that because I was not ‘IMPORTANT’, I have fallen short of God’s DESIRE FOR MY LIFE.

But as I read this, that is not what The Lord is saying. There ain’t no devil big enough, to keep me away from Jesus, there ain’t a past dark enough to keep the light of God’s Love from Illuminating it, there ain’t a future event that is strong enough to take me away from having CONFIDENCE, IN GOD’S WORD, WHICH SAY’S, THERE IS THEREFORE, NOW NO CONDEMNATION. Feeling, Looking, Being, Acting, nothing keeps me from ‘KNOWING, I AM NOT CONDEMNED.’ AND THAT IS MARVELOUS!!! I AM RIGHT UP THERE WITH THE BEST OF THEM.......I REALLY NEED THIS.

Now it don’t change nothing, but my attitude about myself.
It eats away at my ‘self loathing,’ and ‘buoys’ me up like ICE IN WATER
OR SALT IN A SEA..

Love Nina 
later more later