I Know My Redeemer Lives

I know that my Redeemer lives, and that in the end he will stand upon the earth. (Job 19:25)

#226/365

When I have made a fool of myself, I sometimes wonder why God would even consider me to be one of his Redeemed Children, I know in my Heart of Hearts, that He does. He considers me Redeemed from the Curse and this can never be taken away, by any unto-froward actions on my part. I am not keeping me, that would be Religion, I am being Kept, that would be Christianity. No one or thing can pluck me out of His Gracious Hands, for it is all by Grace that I am being saved, not of works, lest any man should boast.
We had driven to the Dermatologist Dr, in N.M. to have precancerous lesions frozen off of Don’s Nose, Ear, and Brow with Liquid Nitrogen. We did some other shopping at Jo Ann's Fabrics and Safeway and then decided at the last minute to go to the Brewery. Now I am paying the consequences of my actions by drinking to much, I am slightly 'touched' for I threw up.

Now it is humbling to throw up. And that my people, I am here to tell you, I am so thankful, that it was so good for me and SO HUMBLING. I cannot imagine having to carry the emotional weight of condemnation around for the rest of my life about others predicaments. I cannot imagine having to ‘carry’ 3 beers inside of me all the way home in that 2 ½ hour drive. The nausea was so relieved when I got it out of my body. I could take the throwing up, that felt really good, the nausea I am so happy that it quit. Needless to say, the acid was horrendous and I have only been able to eat oatmeal and tea and a little coffee this morning. BUT I REALIZED INSTANTLY WHAT A PRIG I HAVE BEEN WITH MY CONDEMNATIONS.

Why did I do this? I am a Christian, who loves the Lord, my God, with all my heart, my soul and my mind. Seems a little bit Oxymorronish, to find someone of my Stature WHO LOVES TO TEACH, AND GIVE ADVICE, NO BODY WANTS, in a  position like this. But really it was not difficult at all. We went to get a beer  before we headed home. Don wanted to sit outside, I told him I thought it was too cold, but as it turned out sitting in the Sunshine actually made me hot, so I started peeling off jackets. Now for someone who does not know me, that is a feat as big as slaying the Giant. One Beer turned into two Beers, by then I was really dancing around, outside. No one was out there, and we sat out in the sun to get some Vitamin D, which I never get, because I am so sedentary, inside writing all the time.

It has been a horrendously long Winter, and here I am faced with Sunshine and music and I was really enjoying myself and actually feeling amorous toward my husband also which is a feat I really like. I love music too. ALL WAS WELL WITH THE WORLD. AND I WAS DOING NO WRONG SONG. So while he talked on the phone to various people I enjoyed myself. I did talk to my Baby Son about visiting Dallas.
Then, I stood up and danced and swayed to the beat of the music and drank # 3 Beer. It tasted so good. I have drank 5 glasses of wine before and only got high a bit. What is 3 beers? Well, I am here to tell you. When you go so high(WITH BEER, MUSIC, SEX, AND SUNSHINE,) you got to come down. My husband hinted that some people inside had come out to ‘watch me’ enjoy myself. SOOO WHAT? AN AUDIENCE DON’T SCARE ME, NOT THE WAY I WAS FEELING. My husband got us a glass of water for # 4 and I am still swaying to the wind, and talking to God. Yes, I could walk out under my own recognizance. We went to the BRAND NEW FLEX.
Now you probably say, God was no where near me, when I was in this state of euphoria. But I disagree heartedly. He was WATCHING ME, EVERY STEP OF THE WAY. AND DIRECTING MY FEET, RIGHT TO THE SIDE OF THE ROAD AS WE PULLED OFF, TO LET ME THROW UP. YES, MY PEOPLE HE WAS RIGHT THERE HELPING ME, GET DOWN FROM THAT HIGH, THAT I COULD NOT CONTROL. HE KNEW IF I THREW UP, I’D ACTUALLY FEEL BETTER. AND I DID. ALBEIT I BAPTIZED THE FLEX.
Now my husband, was perfectly ok. Why I wondered. I think it had something to do with the pain medicine that I had taken that morning for my neck pain. Pain Meds and Beer don’t mix. So I was literally one sick puppy. But GOD HAD MY HUSBAND HELP ME FOR HE WAS DOING OK.
Now, I have also been trying to lose weight. When I got up this morning I  found that I had lost all of 0.8 of a lb. WHICH WAS FANTASTIC. I threw up all that Mexican Food, I had stuffed into my mouth at lunch yesterday. And boy was I guilty of gluttony for I love Mexican Food. I figured out, I had gained 5 lbs over that meal, for sure.
BUT NO ONE IS GOING TO HONE IN ON MY SIN OF GLUTTONY. ONLY ON MY DRINKING TOO MANY BEERS AT THE BREWERY AND THROWING UP. NOW WHY IS THAT? BECAUSE WE WANT TO CALL THE SHOTS AND SAY, THIS SIN AIN’T THAT BAD AND THIS SIN AIN’T THAT GOOD.

BUT PEOPLE, SIN IS SIN. AND WE ARE ALL GUILTY OF IT. THE PROBLEM ARISES IN THINKING WE DON’T DESERVE TO BE REDEEMED BY JESUS. AND I KNOW MY REDEEMER LIVES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now, I don’t care how much you drink or eat or sin, you do deserve to be redeemed. And that in the end He will stand upon the earth., for you and you and you and me. But you can't be proud about it.

THAT’S THE ONE PROBLEM I GOT WITH people who don't drink. THOSE PEOPLE THINK ‘HOW GOOD THEY ARE’ FOR NOT DRINKING EVEN ONE DROP. WELL WHAT ABOUT ALL THE REST OF THE SINS THEY COMMIT DAILY. BEING A MEMBER OF, (A NO DRINKING CLUB,) DON’T MAKE THEM SINLESS, IT ONLY MAKES THEM DRINKLESS. 

Yes, I do think they are a really great bunch of people. Troubled but great, none the less.

AND THE DRINKING RESPONSIBLY, AIN’T GONNA CAUSE THEM PROBLEMS. THE ‘PROUDNESS’ WILL(THAT’S RELIGION).  THE ‘PROUDNESS’ IS CLOSE TO A FALL. THEY ARE ONLY ONE ‘PROUD’ AWAY FROM A FALL, NOT ONE DRINK AWAY FROM A FALL. WHO THEY TRYING TO KID ANYWAY?

Course I do understand being a Drunk certainly disqualifies you for being on the up and up with God. He would prefer you be Drunk in the Spirit!
May the Lord bless you and guard over you. May the Lord make His face shine upon you and be gracious unto you. May the Lord lift up His Countenance upon you and give you peace.

If you do drink, be responsible about it. Best state of being, a teetotaler, with the Nazerine Vow!(3) If a person chooses to withdraw from the material world and consecrate himself exclusively to the service of the Almighty by becoming a Nazir (vowing not to drink wine or eat grape products, come in contact with dead bodies or cut his hair), he must come to the Cohen at the completion of the vow.  Like Sampson! Never had it, don't want it.

Love Nina

From my studies from Rabbi Kalman Packouz
See this article online:
http://www.aish.com/tp/ss/ssw/80532567.html

Torah Portion of the Week

Naso

This week's portion includes further job instructions to the Levites, Moshe is instructed to purify the camp in preparation for the dedication of the Mishkan, the Portable Sanctuary.

Then four laws relating to the Cohanim are given: (1) Restitution for stolen property where the owner is deceased and has no next of kin - goes to the Cohanim. (2) If a man suspects his wife of being unfaithful, he brings her to the Cohanim for the Sotah clarification ceremony . (3) If a person chooses to withdraw from the material world and consecrate himself exclusively to the service of the Almighty by becoming a Nazir (vowing not to drink wine or eat grape products, come in contact with dead bodies or cut his hair), he must come to the Cohen at the completion of the vow. 4) The Cohanim were instructed to bless the people with this blessing: "May the Lord bless you and guard over you. May the Lord make His face shine upon you and be gracious unto you. May the Lord lift up His Countenance upon you and give you peace."

The Mishkan is erected and dedicated on the first of Nissan in the second year after the Exodus. The leaders of each tribe jointly give wagons and oxen to transport the Mishkan. During each of the twelve days of dedication, successively each tribal prince gives gifts of gold and silver vessels, sacrificial animals and meal offerings. Every prince gives exactly the same gifts as every other prince.

* * * Dvar Torah
based on Growth Through Torah by Rabbi Zelig Pliskin

The Torah states:

"And afterwards the Nazir may drink wine" (Numbers 6:20).

After the Nazir completed the entire process described by the Torah, he may drink wine once again. Why does the Torah still call the person a Nazir in this verse since he is no longer in the state of being a Nazir? The Alshich explains that when a person goes through a period of thirty days of being a Nazir, he elevates himself to a high level of spirituality. He is now on such a level that even if he drinks wine it is the drinking of a person on the spiritual level of a Nazir.

Two people can drink wine and the meaning behind their behavior can be totally different. The following two incidents illustrate this clearly:

Rabbi Mordechai Gifter, former Rosh Hayeshiva of Telz, was on an airplane. One of the engines caught on fire and the captain announced an emergency landing in a nearby city. One passenger called out to the flight attendant, "Give me one last drink before I die!" A person who identifies himself entirely with his body and not with his soul keeps this attitude even at the very last minute of his life. (The plane landed safely and no one died.)

Second story: A very righteous Torah scholar lived an ascetic life and denied himself many of life's pleasures. When he was on his deathbed he asked, "Please bring me a glass of wine before I die. My entire life I denied my body physical pleasures. Now I want to ask my body forgiveness and I wish to appease it with a glass of wine." The righteous man identified himself entirely with his soul. His request for a final drink of wine was with the spirituality of a Nazir.